The
first contact between the newborn and the parents is often romanticized. After
the intense process of labor relieve and excitement is a given, but when fatigue and exhaustion kick in it can take weeks to recuperate. During this
time the parents hold a total stranger in their arms; an infant that cries a
lot, has wet diapers, dry skin, sleeps little and presents him/her with an insatiable appetite.
Family,
friends and neighbors can’t wait to get a look at the long awaited. Drop-in
visits usually occur when the infant is asleep and the sleep-deprived parents
watch the clock ticking its way to the next crucial feeding. Where many
advocate for the benefits of breastfeeding, it might be rubbing salt into the
wound – breastfeeding is at the beginning and to say the least, a physical and
mental challenge.
Centuries
ago most families lived close together and help was more readily at hand. Nowadays most
families live apart and the nuclear takes all responsibility for the upbringing
of the infant. It is often heard from modern day parents that the infant must
adapt to their way of living, and the infant’s name gets placed on the
daycare’s waiting list as Baby X. (After birth the baby will be suitably named.)
Due
to a number of factors, bonding with the infant during the first weeks might be demanding and can provoke feelings of guilt or inadequacy, leading to maternity
blues and depression.
Thinking
of the skin as a doorway of communication with the outside world, stimulation
of the skin is vital.
An
ancient tradition, handed down from generation to generation, is infant
massage. India is one of the world leaders in this field and when walking
through the streets one can often see a woman calming the infant by massaging
the legs and stomach with oils. What a gift when the infant can learn how to relax and
letting go of the stressors in a harmonious, respectful environment. This beautiful custom also
enhances the bonding between infant and caregiver.
Parents who received training and practice this infant massage on a daily basis
refer to it as laying the fundamentals for a healthy, harmonious relationship and accomplished bonding.
* Disclaimer: Babies might be in physical or psychological distress and in need of
medical attention. Infant-massage might under certain circumstances not be advisable.
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